Recreate happy moments to remember our loved ones
Him: Should we put lantern this year? Shall I buy new lights?
Me: Yes. I am going to make besan laddoos and shankarpali.
We were thinking of preparing for Diwali, the festival of lights. This year has redefined our lives, including festivals. Many families will observe grimmer festivities as they grieve the loss of their dear ones to this deadly virus. Some may not observe at all.
We are no different. A virus of another kind took our mother on a faraway journey, without a return ticket. Hence the question – Should you celebrate Diwali? Or any festival for that matter. It’s a year of mourning.
Last seven months I have been thinking of this from so many perspectives. Death is painful. It makes us sad to see our loved ones depart. Definitely, we miss them very much, every moment.
Mourning and the practices associated with it have deep philosophical and religious beliefs. We do follow them, sometimes as a way of life. Emotional healing will take time. The void is permanent. Some exceptions can help us to overcome the grief by leading our daily lives in a manner that will make the departed soul happy.
Can we remember our loved ones with a smile? Think of the happy moments – meals together, travel, follow their teachings, prepare their favourite food, visit the place they loved or enjoy a movie in their memory…
Diwali symoblises the victory of good over evil. It is associated with prosperity and celebrates the return of Lord Ram back to Ayodhya. People decorate their houses, make sweets, dress in new clothes and exchange gifts. Colourful rangolis, artistic designs of traditional paper lanterns add glimmer to this festival of joy and hope.
Hope is what helps us triumph over evil, surpass challenges – of life and death. Looking back I remember the happy moments, festivals we celebrated together, online shopping that we enjoyed amidst facing a grave health challenge. “Doctor, I am enjoying my illness,” is what inspires, encourages me to face difficult situations with courage.
Hence, I chose to conduct myself in a way that would have made my mother happy. Last year she taught me to make her signature preparation – besan laddoo. All the past years of pestering, making me observe her cook gave me the confidence to try the same laddoos this Diwali. Happiness was to see them get the similar texture, colour and taste. Each bite reminds me of her happy and satisfied face, if she was alive.
As we lit the Diwali diyas and put the lightings, I could sense her voice telling me “Buy the paper lantern from our neighbourhood person. Our small gesture helps their sale.” Thoughtfulness that is so pertinent today. Our festive shopping can support local vendors, help small businesses survive in this gloomy environment.
This Diwali, I decided to overcome the good over evil by recreating the practices and habbits my mother would have loved to see me follow – homemade faral, small Pooja, dressing up, wishing elders and thinking about the people who support us.
Wishing all my readers A Happy Diwali & a Prosperous New Year. Enjoy the festivities with lots of Love & Gratitude!
Nurture Winning Thoughts!
Tejal
