A year of self-discovery and life experiences
30th September 2011 – Heathrow Airport: I was returning home after completing MA in Marketing Communications – juggling immigration and duty free shopping. Aai called with a lot of excitement “Quickly listen to this poem I have written on you. I just thought of it in office.” She started narrating it over the phone.
When I landed she was ready to receive me with the poem framed and a bouquet of flowers. It was her first poem. Since then she penned so many of them – for family members, celebrating special occasions, devotional ones and even saluting the doctors and nurses taking care of her. Aai became our family poetess.
During my time in Kingston Upon Thames, London we both had developed a new routine or a relationship. She would call me late night India time, just after my university. She would give me updates from back home, checking my routine, assignments, trying to understand life there, etc. Don’t come back in a hurry – travel, enjoy the moment, she would always urge.
On the contrary, my father started using Facebook to communicate with me. Our Facebook chats and emails became common. Our conversations would be void of anything back home that will disturb or distract me.
My Sunday mornings would often begin with a brother’s call to check about some restaurant recommendations in Mumbai. Every festival he would share pictures from home. I enjoyed my adventure of watching the 100th Test match between India and England at Lords only because of him.
These memories were possible because I ventured to study abroad, relatively late as I was turning 30. I had never thought I will leave Mumbai to study abroad. Certainly not to London.
When I first considered finding courses abroad, I thought of Singapore. My cousin stayed there. Another option was Australia, again because a cousin had just moved there to study. I had travelled international only once. I had no friends or acquaintances in other countries except these two. Going to US or UK was a big big step for so many other reasons.
Another frightening thought was of long flights. Singapore was just 5 hours, overnight journey. I am scared of heights. How to survive a long flight alone was a hidden demon in my mind.
Dream Big
The decision to study further was born out of some internal restlessness. A long break from work due to illness became my fodder to think. Going back to studying after a gap of almost 8 years was a big leap from Indian perspective.
Once the university started I realised it was not uncommon to do a masters course when you are about to turn 30. Applying for a university in UK was the first important lesson of the winning spirit to Dream Big.
Independent Living
One year of my stay in Kingston taught me to be independent – in every sense. Manage yourself, your finances, budgeting, cooking, etc. It shapes your personality, makes you aware of your own choice, take decisions. It could be as simple as to eat out, if you need to buy new clothes, paying bills, etc.
Growing up in a middle-class Indian society, I read and watched about teenagers staying alone in the USA. Later during my brief stint in corporate world I came across girls staying alone in Mumbai, moving cities for work and studies. As this city grew and so did many other problems, there was a need to move independently within the city. Normalising independent living has become far more essential as the Indian society and family structures are changing.
Beyond Fat Packages
Conventionally Indians students travelled abroad for higher studies, followed by better career prospects. With the boom in Information Technology, demand for technical skills and work opportunities the international destination often became a permanent address.
Once our course started, we also got advice and guidance of rules and regulations of finding job opportunities. My course did not allow me to pursue part-time job. 2010-11 was also the period of another economic slowdown, especially in the Europe and UK. The issue of granting work permits and allowing international students became a point of deliberation.
Upon returning to Mumbai, during most of my conversations I was asked about what I gained from going abroad. How much pay hike did I get? Does it really make a difference? Why did I not continue working there?
Everyone has own journey and an experience. Having an opportunity to get work experience would have definitely made me happy. Personally, it was beyond a fat pay package.
My friend Renuka echoed similar sentiments. When I asked her about three key takeaways for her from the UK stay, she said the following:
- It’s not about what course you took and the learning from it. Studying in the UK taught me life skills, which I feel every student should experience. It makes them independent.
- Indians in general have a knack of doing things differently/quickly/smartly as compared to other nationalities. So don’t underestimate yourself.
- People around the world are just like you, they aren’t superior or inferior. They are just like you.
If not for that random post-work dinner and a long conversation under the banyan tree, we both would have not shared these memories 10 years later. I experienced my first ever snow fall with Renuka at her university campus.
The flight I boarded on 12th September 2010 to London gave me many life experiences and the winning spirit to take that leap of faith in the unexplored terrains.
Nurture Winning Thoughts!
Tejal
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